Tuesday, July 29, 2003

Meeting people is easy
How do people meet other people? I'm seriously asking. If you are reading this and you know the answer, for heaven's sake tell me! Most people seem to meet other people, I know this because otherwise there wouldn't be circa 6,000,000,000 people on this planet; so why is it, in actuality, impossible? I can imagine being hit by lightning twice in the same day, on a day that a meteor hits my house, driving it three miles into the ground while I miraculously survive only to look up at a blue moon before I can imagine meeting someone. Why am I even writing this? No one will even comment on it; or if they do, the answer will miraculously not apply to me because nothing applies to me and human-beings concordantly.

I'm so fucking lonely. Sexual relations is the most natural primal urge we have, and I can't ever quench it. This is much worse than the feeling you get quitting smoking, and I have no option of "starting again", nor will the feeling ever go away. I'm trapped in a prison; a fetid, sexless prison.

But no, it isn't even sex I want. I can't really explain why, but it's love or companionship I want. And for some reason it has to be with a member of the opposite sex. I just want to be with a fucking woman. Why is it so incredibly impossible? How do people do it? Should I just go out onto the street, asking out every woman I see? Should I go to a "singles bar"? Should I jump into a volcano, hoping that a gust of wind will wisk me away from my fiery doom and onto a tropical island where miraculously the same thing happened to a woman who has the exact same disposition as I? All these things seem equally probable to me, and obviously it's not in my capacity to do them.

I wish I could make what must be a hilarious rant to you longer, but I don't feel like typing anymore.

And no, I'm not sorry about using the word "miraculously" three four times in one post.